Beautyprenuer Ph | Much Ado About Wellness (Part 2): On The Value Of Wellness Routines And Personal Journeys | Tatler Asia – The animated, interesting conversation that transpired among the ten panellists of the Wellness Forum organised by Tatler Philippines and hosted by Nikki Tang continues.

FRANCISCO: I want to ask Nikki. You took up engineering in college. So, how did you find the path to beauty? And did this path to beauty lead you to Wellness?

NIKKI TANG: I grew up in a very entrepreneurial family. My grandmother and my mother are really both into selfcare. My grandmother is now 94. She’s a true inspiration. So, from engineering, an opportunity in the beauty business came. Big shift. But because I come from a Chinese family, business has always been in our DNA.

I took the challenge of bringing in a new beauty brand. I started collaborating with dermatologists in the country. But the timing was good ‘cuz there was also a market demand. The market evolved along the way and gave us a lot of access to bring in more innovations from around the world. I’ve been breaking the barriers for the Philippine market and I am very humbled and happy for the success of the business that we are in right now.

My personal journey of wellness is a self-discipline. This allows me to develop my team’s wellbeing and success, to continue inspiring them. As a leader it allows me also to develop clarity of mind because being an entrepreneur is not easy, as what Ida mentioned earlier.

It’s also good that today, Filipinos are more open to talk about mental health. And there are also the podcasts, sessions, this forum ─activities that are very, very good platforms for sharing, training and educating others.

We also have to be kind to ourselves and humble enough to seek help. Although I am in the business of aesthetics and beauty, which are very important to feeling good, what is more important is that we are able to sustain our mental health. Feeling good inside emits the glow of someone who’s happy with themselves.

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ZUBIRI: Honestly, the glow of someone who’s happy with themselves is so different from someone who’s not. There’s a lot of people who put on all this makeup. They look great, like you can’t see anything wrong. But there’s something missing. That’s why brides are always so beautiful because they’re glowing inside. Or new mothers who might be tired but still have that glow.

I’m fascinated by Buddhism and its four pillars: compassion or loving kindness, impermanence, acceptance and non-attachment. I have applied the pillars in my life but non-attachment is like a big thing. Nothing is permanent so you can’t be attached to anything, right?

I think a big part of my wellness journey is listening to my body and listening to my emotions, and rather than taking charge is being an observer. Like starting to see myself in third person. Why am I feeling this way? Why does that trigger me? Why am I reacting this way to this food? Why am I like being able to observe so that I can make better decisions rather than being reactive?

LAUREL: Yeah, there should be a balance. For everything. Because we cannot deprive ourselves with the joys of life.

ALL: Never!!!

MADSEN: It’s really what is important to your life.

ALL: Yeah!!!

MADSEN: As a brand consultant, I conceptualise ideas. I look at photos every day and it’s very visually heavy for me. That’s why I like the space. I like everything neutral. I like to have a quiet time because I constantly need to be inspired to produce things. So, I walk every day.

PREYSLER-FRANCISCO: There’s no right or wrong [fitness regimen]. My 7:30 every day CrossFit is like Monique’s 5am wake-up and having coffee. I have been struggling with feelings of unworthiness. I always have to remind myself I’m worthy. My workouts have made me feel that focus, that discipline, that mindset of winning. That’s what’s kept me well. You may not have come from a healthy family but a healthy family can come from you. I read that somewhere.

FRANCISCO: But also, remember that video of yours where you talk about improving your makeup…

PREYSLER-FRANCISCO: Like I said, it’s hygiene, skincare, it’s wholistic. It’s every single dimension of Wellness that go hand in hand, but just in varying degrees.

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MADSEN: Yeah. I believe everybody translates wellness differently. There’s no one formula. But sometimes I feel like we get stuck in trends. I come across friends and who say, ‘I’m following this, I followed her thing. Why am I not happier?’ And I tell them, that’s the thing, because you’re following somebody else.

ZUBIRI: So true. At the end of the day, people will connect with you because of your own personal journey. Your superpower is being uniquely you. All the knowledge mentioned here are nothing new. Stoicism, Buddhism ─all this wisdom is ancient! It’s just the way you communicate it for others. Wellness and wellbeing and being able to nourish your body, mind and spirit ─it’s a spectrum. Joanna has her way. So does Monique and everyone else. And there’s space for all of it.

True healing is painful and hard. Real healing is hagulgul [sobbing], crying, questioning your life choices. It’s looking at all your ugly shit. Real healing is about sitting with all the ugliness and being able, like a lotus, to rise above those muddy waters. I really encourage people in my workshops in Reiki healing to clear their energy and feel good, but also to call their therapist to address the issues I have seen in them. But many never do. So, they’re just like taking an Advil with my class. I’m like, Girl, you can’t keep coming back to me every week. If you’re not willing to do the work of looking inside you, tearing yourself apart and putting yourself back together, then you really can’t be whole. It’s only when you are whole that you can be whole for others.

LOPEZ-VITO BUCOY: For me wellness is also knowing how to edit the people…

ALL: Amen!!!

LOPEZ-VITO BUCOY: …if they’re toxic in your life. I truly believe in forgiving, but don’t forget, but don’t forget, never can learn from that and also say, okay, I forgive you, but …and you don’t have to tell this to the person, by the way… I’m setting my boundaries because I want to live a happier life without you. Yeah. That for me is one of the keys to living a really happy life and that’s wellness for me.

Sometimes you have to do this to someone you love, that it hurts. You can’t hate them but you can push them aside. Say to yourself, ‘I can love you from afar.’

PREYSLER-FRANCISCO: What you’re saying is my Instagram topic on adult friendships and editing these relationships. I have some friendships that are like 40 years or 30 years old but which do not work anymore because both of us have grown so differently. We’re not good for each other anymore. So, it’s acknowledging that and saying it’s okay.

ZUBIRI: I always say KKJ. Kanya kanyang journey [Each to his own journey]. And someone said: Friends for a reason, friends for a season, friends for a lifetime.

PREYSLER-FRANCISCO: Like Franco, we have known each other since forever but it’s not like I’m always waiting for him to call.

LAUREL: It’s respect. Respect for each other. And the connection that you have will carry that relationship on even if you don’t see each other or talk to each other regularly.  

LIJAUCO: You all say Wellness is wholistic. Can you share some of your favourite Wellness products and routines?  

LAUREL: I really love La Mer and Clinique. Hello, Sharyn!

[Laughter all around.]

FRANCISCO: Speaking about routines, I think it’s part of Wellness. At the end of the day, one of my favourite things is getting my skincare routine. I light a candle, some incense and do my skincare. If you had a terrible day, this will take the stress away.

WONG: In fact, I do that on a Sunday because Monday is the most intense day of the week. I like to do this in my bedroom, turn down the light, put on some relaxing music. Maybe do this for 10 minutes, and I’m fine!

MADSEN: I do a similar routine. I fill the tub with hot water and make a spa out of it. But I stay in the tub like six hours!

WONG: Natural oils I personally find useful for me; something that will evoke emotions. I personally like Bobbi Brown’s Soothing Cleansing Oil to remove my makeup daily. You know, the ginseng cream. Those are scented and when you apply it on, you really get a nice feeling. Every day I wear different scents, depending on my mood.

LAUREL: You know Sharyn, Jo Malone makes me feel so good.

ZUBIRI: I haven’t changed perfumes since high school. I appreciate it when people give me perfumes but I give them to people who I know appreciate scents because I feel weird when I don’t smell like myself. It’s the original CHANEL Chance eau de parfum I’ve been using since high school.

I’m very also sensitive to scents; I have lots of different scented candles. I also have a bathtub routine. I love bathtub meditation. I put on healing music, bath salts, bubbles, the whose shebang and I listen to guided meditation.

PREYSLER-FRANCISCO: I don’t have Monique’s six hours bathtub routine. My cooling down and I my me time is I love to cook.

TANG: Me, I love massages. We carry this oil that’s good for massages.

ZUBIRI: I love oils, face oils, body oils. More than cream.

LAUREL: How should one moisturise? When? How often?

PREYSLER-FRANCISCO: I moisturise three times a day, a moisturiser with SPF. You must wear SPF every day. I even have workout makeup. So, I wake up, take a cold shower to wake me up. And then I drink my hydration, my electrolytes. Then I drink my coffee. I change. For my moisturiser, I use Heliocare, tinted, with 50 SPF. Nikki, this is your product.

LAUREL: I also moisturise. Not that I don’t wanna look my age, I’m 50, but it’s for my skincare which I think is part of my Wellness routine. I’m so glad Nikki and Sharyn are here to share their products with us. Wink, wink. I cleanse with Clinique and then I do my moisturising with La Mer.

ZUBIRI: Cleansing and beautification are, after all, purification rituals since the ancient times. It’s what the high priestesses would do in ancient Egypt.

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LIJAUCO: Well, we’ve just about covered everything we said we’d talk about but let me go back a bit to mental wellness and ask Michelle to share what she knows.

PASTELERO: I work in the education industry. The Philippines is ranked one of the lowest in PISA rating. [PISA, the Program for International Student Assessment, is an international tool that measures 15-year-old students’ reading, mathematics and science literacy. There are a number of reasons but mental health is high on this list.

MADSEN: I think mental health needs a rebrand. Once the topic comes up, it already carries a stigma.

ZUBIRI: I’ve heard it being called mental wellbeing.

MADSEN: That’s nice. Or mental health awareness.

ZUBIRI: But I think softening it also diminishes its importance.

WONG: Our company offers mental health workshops. We offer our employees access to self-helps. We are still in practicing hybrid to lessen the stress of commuting. Whatever needs to be done. They don’t need to go home right away. They can do their spa and recover their me-time even just for two hours.

PREYSLER-FRANCISCO: It’s human nature to delve on the negative and ignore the positive, even if the latter outweighs the former. I think what’s healthy is the refocusing of what I choose to listen to about myself.

LAUREL: At the end of the day, you cannot pretend to be somebody else.